


throw away our old presumptions

by protegostark (aaeiilnn)



Series: all that i love (all that i need) [7]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Bugs, Civil War Team Iron Man, Flobberworms, Gen, I mean, James "Rhodey" Rhodes is a Good Bro, Minister for Magic Hermione Granger, Not Steve Friendly, Pixies, Post-Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie), Tony Stark Does What He Wants, Tony Stark Has Magic, Wanda Maximoff Redemption, but theres a bit of, finding out about magic, he doesnt use it tho, im not attacking them THAT much, not team Cap friendly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-27
Updated: 2020-08-27
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:42:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,591
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26136715
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/aaeiilnn/pseuds/protegostark
Summary: "Ah, Director Nicholas Fury, I presume?" The brunette walked forward to shake his hand. "There's never been a need for either of us to meet since I've usually worked with those in Europe for these past months.""Minister Hermione Granger." Fury responded, Agent Hill right behind him. "It's a pleasure to meet you. May I introduce you to the Avengers."Prompts:HPQuoteBingo: "You can laugh, but people used to believe there was no such thing as a Blibbering Humdinger or a Crumple-Horned Snorkack!"SuperpowerBingo: Control Bugs
Relationships: Hermione Granger & Tony Stark
Series: all that i love (all that i need) [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1623931
Comments: 11
Kudos: 271





	throw away our old presumptions

**Author's Note:**

> i cannot beliEVE i succumbed and wrote a not team cap friendly fic 😞 i actually hate thats its a guilty pleasure of mine to read thos kinds of fics because i want to lean more into the 'grow up theyve both made mistakes' side but mcu handled the post-cw life badly and i need this to survive. it's not incredibly bad, I think? it's not even that detailed because I'm playing on the obliviousness of the rest of the team.
> 
> i will be honest that i think this isn't in any of the top things i wrote AT ALL and am pretty disappointed at how this turned out😕 so im just putting this out there so i can cross it out of my list.
> 
> title from: the dragon song by team starkid
> 
> Prompts:  
> HPQuoteBingo: "You can laugh, but people used to believe there was no such thing as a Blibbering Humdinger or a Crumple-Horned Snorkack!"  
> SuperpowerBingo: Control Bugs

"I have no idea what just happened." Sam stated as he stared blankly at the table. "Wh-Where did they even come from?"

They're at a debriefing. The Avengers were called in early this morning because of some weird sightings at a secluded little town. And if this mission wasn't 'weird', then the word would have to be redefined.

It was a bug infestation. Bugs were crawling and flying (the worst kind) around the town, and all the people were trapped in their houses. But it wasn't just normal bugs, these were the size of human. And there were four different colors. (Red, brown, yellow, and purple).

Even weirder, these weren't just enlarged bugs. They were bugs that none of them had never even seen before. Steve remembered frantically asking the team on the in-ear radio for any ideas, but no one recognizes the thing.

Nat was beside him as they both tried to stab at it with a dagger or with the long metal piece they found in the streets, but the skin (or was it a shell?) was too sticky that they only lost their weapons. Wanda succeeded in making one of them explode, but Vision noted that the insides and the blood somehow melted through one of the street signs that it touched, so they shelved that idea. Rhodey was blasting repulsors at it while Sam was trying to shoot guns at it from the air, but the noise only caused several of it to follow them. None of them were sure what to do.

Well, none except Tony, apparently.

He didn't exactly say he knew what it was, but there was this weird sort of confidence in the way he moved, like he's dealt with this before. Iron Man joined the battle late, as he has for the past several missions, if he decides to show up, that is. (Steve thinks he needs to talk to Tony about this.) But the moment he showed up, there was no hesitation telling the team to get water and spray like crazy.

They were reluctant and asked questions about how he knew (except Rhodey who was quick to copy Tony's actions), but when they saw him pour water on one of the creatures, it squealed, squirmed, and went still. Tony continued on doing what he can while the others tried to follow. Unfortunately, there wasn't a huge source of water nearby and they didn't really have any container to carry water with. Vision and Wanda managed to find a small well and move the water to attack the bugs. Nat used a hose connected to one of the houses. Steve collected water with some buckets he found in a wooden shed and passed them to Sam to take to the air.

Unfortunately, they were so limited, and the bugs were still flying around like crazy.

That's when another weird thing happened.

At first, he thought it was a civilian, so Steve warned them to go back in their house and that it was too dangerous. But the cloaked figure paid him no attention and raised his hand which was holding a stick. Some sort of red light came out of it, a lazer, Steve assumed, and it hit one of the creatures. 

Steve, Sam, and Natasha paused in their work to watch in surprise as the creatures the man would hit seem to shrink slowly as they gathered to him. They began to notice several other similarly dressed people walking scattered around doing the same thing. 

Before anyone could ask how they were doing that, a rogue bug had appeared out of nowhere and they were forced into action again until the bug was unresponsive. When they turned to find the cloaked figure, he was gone and so were those like him. Not even a second later, Fury had joined their radio and ordered for them to get back to the headquarters as soon as possible for a debriefing.

Which is where they are now. And still, none of them were able to make sense of it. Steve, Natasha, and Sam updated Wanda and Vision (Tony and Rhodey had chosen to fly back on their own) of what they saw and yet none if them were able to make a solid guess apart from the cloaked people being involved in the cause of the infestation in the first place.

"Get up," Fury said the moment he walked in. "Follow me and keep your mouths shut." 

They exchanged looks, but followed anyway, used to how Fury sometimes skips the explanation for things. Tony grumbled a bit, (presumably about being ordered around, Steve thought with a shake of his head) but Rhodey was quick to pat him in the back and push him to move with the group.

They were lead into another meeting room, much deeper underground. Natasha spots no CCTV or space for any obvious audio recorders along the walls and ceilings. She notices how it's soundproofed. Her shoulders tensed. This is serious, she began to realize. The door were then locked ( _four_ times) supporting her ideas before Fury faced them.

"None of your gadgets should be working." Fury looked pointedly at Tony as he addressed everyone. 

Tony shrugged. "Mine are always better. How would you know?"

Fury checked his watch. "The people you're about to meet are important. No recordings of any sort is a vital part of the conditions when it comes to meetings with them. This room was made with their help and should be able to block any gadgets from working, but I'm not willing to take chances so," Fury took a deep breath, "if you could take a damn minute to check your phone, Stark, do it."

Tony scoffed. "You could have just asked properly with a pretty please on top. I was told that's how you should be getting people to do what you want." Tony muttered as he brought out his phone and swiped at the screen. "Not that I do that, but maybe you could learn from it."

"Well?"

He flipped the screen at them. "Works properly." Fury and Agent Hill stared at his phone for a second in surprise. "What kind of scrambler were you trying to use? Doesn't even do anything."

"Nevermind," Agent Hill replied in a rush. "Just shut down your phone, they're about to be here any—"

A loud _pop!_ cracked through the room and Wanda stared at the three people who appeared out of nowhere. Literally. She held onto Vision's arm beside her for a bit more support and saw him watching the newcomers curiously.

"What the hell?" Sam exclaimed softly from her other side, and she couldn't help but agree with the sentiments.

The woman leading them had bushy brown hair and brown eyes that you could practically see the intelligence shining from. There is a man behind her with what looks to be a floating piece of brown paper and a black pen with it, scribbling things down noisily. The other woman had green hair neatly braided back and narrowed eyes that were the same color and scanned each of them.

Fury made to step forward but the green-haired woman signalled him to stop and the man moved to pass pieces of paper around. "If you could all sign these non-disclosure agreement contracts that ensure none of what is discussed in this meeting will be known by others that are unnecessary and/or uninvolved, we may proceed with the discussion.

There was a beat of silence before Fury took a pen and signed quickly, the rest of the team following. Rhodey thinks he saw his sign subtly glow a dark red, but he put his attention on the two people in front instead.

"Ah, Director Nicholas Fury, I presume?" The brunette walked forward to shake his hand. "There's never been a need for either of us to meet since I've usually worked with those in Europe for these past months."

"Minister Hermione Granger." Fury responded, Agent Hill right behind him. "It's a pleasure to meet you. May I introduce you to the Avengers."

"Please, call me Granger. I've actually been informed about the group since its formation. I understand a friend of mine was attempted to be recruited, yet he had other duties." She smiled at each of them politely. "Hello, I am Hermione Granger, the Minister of the Ministry of Magic. It's the government, I suppose, of the magical folks in the United Kingdom area."

" _Magical_ folks?" Wanda repeated in a questioning tone. "What do you mean?"

"It's as you hear it, Ms. Maximoff." Granger glanced at her. "Folks with magic."

"Like me?"

Granger tilted her head. "We don't exactly consider you as one of us. Nor what you do as magic. Quite frankly, that was easily decided on ever since my people heard your moniker as the 'witch'. You work differently from us." Wanda looked put off by her words.

"Wanda does magic." Steve defended, sending encouraging and supportive looks to Wanda. "She's really good at it."

Granger looked at him for a second, and he didn't seem to notice, but the coldness in her eyes were obvious to Natasha. "We can agree to disagree, Mr. Rogers."

"Captain," Sam corrected instinctively.

She smiled knowingly. "No, he's not." And she continued on, ignoring the spluttering and confusion of both Sam and Steve. "Anyway, I've come here to thank you all personally for your efforts in helping out a few hours ago. I feel that it's necessary to inform you of how the situation came to be instead of waiting for you to try and figure it out yourselves and find something you're not qualified to know."

"You mean magic?" Rhodey clarified.

She nodded. "Yes. Oh, before I forget, this is my secretary, Glyn Conifer. He will be recording today's short meeting." She gestured to the man in a brown suit who passed the the papers earlier. He waved at them before turning his attention back to the roll of parchment, which was now floating, with a pen that seemed to be writing on its own. "And this is Auror Melissa Cygnet, who headed the efforts to calm the creatures earlier." The green haired girl nodded in acknowledgment.

"As I said earlier, we are from the Ministry of Magic, which mostly deals with happenings in the European side of the world. However, the incident today had originated from an underground experiment based in London on flobberworms and pixies." She shook her head. "Rest assured, it has been stopped and dealt with. And the people of that town will be compensated and aided according to the laws set by the International Confederation of Wizards. This will also be our formal apology for causing trouble for you today and a promise to do better."

" _Pixies_?" Wanda asked, somehow stuck in that word. "And what are _flobberworms_?"

Natasha narrowed her eyes. "This isn't some stupid joke, is it?" It's doubtful. This isn't Fury's style. But it's just a bit hard to believe that she's never even come across one before.

Steve agreed with Natasha's question. How could an entire community, apparently big enough to have different governments across the world, have gone completely under the radar? It just seems impossible.

Rhodey looked at all of them in confusion. "How is this hard to believe? We've seen _aliens_. Is this really too unrealistic?"

"Well, when you say it like that, sure." Sam smiled amusedly. "But pixies and magic and wands, like in the fairy tales?" He laughed.

Tony spoke up for the first time since the three people appeared, sounding excited. "You can laugh, but people used to believe there was no such thing as a Blibbering Humdinger or a Crumple-Horned Snorkack!"

Granger laughed, surprising everyone else. "Tony, I don't think that helps anyone."

He looked back at her. "Sure, but I heard that exact sentence from Luna years ago and thought that I'd be honored to use it in a conversation someday." Tony spread his arms, grinning widely. "That day has finally come."

"You know each other?" Agent Hill interjected, seeing as Fury was stuck looking suspiciously at Tony. The rest of the team, Rhodey included, were surprised at the easy way the two seemed to communicate.

Granger furrowed her eyebrows. "Oh. I suppose you wouldn't know. The family ties were kept a secret, yes?"

Tony hummed in agreement. "Our mothers are siblings. Miss Granger here is my cousin. No one ever found out because mom didn't want her side of the family to be exposed to the craziness being a Stark comes with. Plus, it was one thing to keep the magic thing a secret, but for it to happen to my cousin as well? It would've been harder to cover up." He shrugged. "The boarding school excuse wears off after a while."

"So, you…" Fury trailed off, not knowing how to phrase his words, but Tony understood.

"Went to some magical school?" He twirled his phone in his hand. "Yes. For the first four years at least, then I went to MIT." He nodded to Rhodey who had a thoughtful look on his face. "It was the only academic thing I never finished, but to be fair, those four years were _weird_."

"Well, you're just lucky to avoid the last three." Granger muttered half-heartedly.

He shot her a teasing look. "You're the one who decided to go back to repeat the last year."

"Hold on, you have magic?" Rhodey stated more than asked. If Steve's being honest, that's a bit relieving to hear because it means Tony kept it from all of them. But seriously, _another_ secret? 

Tony pouted at Rhodey. "Sorry, platypus. Statute of secrecy. I'm not exempted."

The colonel rolled his eyes, but, if anything, he understood. "Only you, Tones. I shouldn't even be surprised." He clasped a hand on his shoulder for a second, bringing a smile to Tony's face.

"You should have told, Stark." Fury insisted. Agent Hill nodding behind him, and Natasha's glare supporting his tone.

Granger looked at him immediately. "If it's somehow escaped your attention, Tony already gave a reason for that. Statute of secrecy." She repeated Tony's words. "No one is exempted from that. Not me, not Tony, and now that you're informed, not any of you." She leveled a glare at each of them before going back to Fury. "I expected more."

"Why hide a whole community?" Steve spoke up. "I mean, there must be so much you could do with magic. Why not share that with the world and help? Like what Wanda does!" He gestured to Wanda who looked unsure at his words.

Granger narrowed her eyes. "Mr. Rogers, have the Salem Witch Trials escaped your attention? Or maybe the unjust treatment of mutants?" She scoffed. "Even if we don't bring those up, humans already have a terrible habit of discriminating against those that are different and difficult to understand. Adding magic to that?" She shook her head sadly. "No, I'd rather my people deal with our own problems and yours deal with yours."

The secretary, Glyn Conifer, waved his hand from the back where he stood with the other woman and the magical pen self-writing on the floating roll of paper. Granger nodded at the signal and immediately turned back to the polite political smile she had when she first entered, ignoring Steve who seemed to have more to say.

"My apologies. It seems I'm running out of time and have other duties to attend to. I assume that you can reiterate the importance of the statute and the contract?" Agent Hill nodded. "Then I must go. Tony, a word, please?"

Tony immediately stood and walked to the far side of the room where they exchanged hushed words. Meanwhile, the green-haired girl moved towards Wanda and slipped a piece of paper in her hands, whispering something on she could hear. Both conversations ended at the same time, and, with another _pop!_ , the magical people disappeared once more.

Fury looked torn between asking either of them about it, but Agent Hill stepped forward first. "Alright, so the contract you signed? It's serious. You had no choice but to sign it, but now it means you're not allowed to speak of the existence of their world to people who doesn't know about it. Yes, that includes Barton." She sent a look to Natasha before moving on. "It's not just some legal problem if you break the contract. They will deal with you in the way they find necessary, and we won't help you. Their statute of secrecy is one of, if not the, most serious laws they take in their world and they have ways to monitor it. So, even if you just whisper it or write it down for someone to read then burn it after? You will be found out. Understood?"

The team agreed and waited for an awkward moment of silence to pass. Fury didn't have the patience. "Maximoff, what's on the paper?"

"Oh, well," she started, looking confused before unfolding the brown paper in her hands. "She — the Auror, was it? — said that a lot of people on their side have been watching over what I've been doing since I'm somehow like the representative of what non-magical people view to be magic. And they noticed that I don't exactly have the best of control?" She said in a questioning tone that implied she didn't know what to think of that. "This is a number of some place that they think can help me. I think it's not from their world though."

"I think you're doing great with your powers, Wanda." Steve said sincerely, noticing how she looked away at the mention of her lack of control.

Wanda sighed. "They're not wrong though, are they?"

"Well," Rhodes replied. "If you think that way, then maybe there's something worth checking in that paper. At worst, they can't help you train, but at best, they help you be better."

Her lips finally curled up into a small smile as Wanda looked at the paper with some semblance of hope.

"Stark." Fury called out, looking at him as if expecting some explanation.

Tony raised an eyebrow. "I thought I was already excused because of the statute of secrecy."

"Not that." Fury rolled his eye. "The conversation."

"Am I not allowed to have a private conversation with my cousin now?" He looked at each of them. "Do I need permission to speak with my only cousin?"

"Your cousin doesn't seem like the type to talk family and catch up in a work-related meeting." 

"As if you'd know." Tony pressed his fingers against his temple, as if willing a headache to go away. "Fine, she asked about the possibility of me being consulted for something that happened recently in their world. Stop asking more questions, there is such a thing as client confidentiality, even in the Wizarding World."

"Will you take it up?" Came another question from Fury.

Tony huffed, seeing his demand was ignored again. "Maybe. I'm about to get a lot more free time after all."

With a nod, Fury expressed his satisfaction in the answer and left the room. Agent Hill followed closely at his heels. The rest of the team stared at Tony who paid them no attention and was preparing to leave as well.

"What free time, Tony?" Steve asked to which Tony just stared back, looking a bit confused.

"Do you not know?" Tony asked back, but remained standing. He noticed the blank looks of the other members and furrowed his eyebrows. "Has Fury not told any of you? Platypus, you know this, right?" He turned quickly to face the colonel watching with an amused expression on his face.

"Yes," he placated the genius. "You told me weeks ago."

"What is this about, Tony?" Natasha asked.

He sent her a grin. "Well, little miss spider, I'm officially retiring from the Avengers. Sent it to Fury and everything two weeks ago and it's going to be official starting today." Tony watched their unfiltered confusion. "It's really not my fault Fury didn't tell you."

"You can't quit being Iron Man."

"Yes," Tony acknowledged the point Sam raised. "I can't. But I am quitting the Avengers, which, if you must be reminded, existed post-Iron Man. So," he shrugged carelessly.

Steve shook his head, standing up to approach the other. "You can't do this, Tony. You're a part of the team."

"Oh, Cap." Tony met his eyes, before slipping on his signature sunglasses and sending another grin. "If you still think that, it's all the more reason for me to go." And he turned on his heels and walked out of the room.

Rhodes stood from his seat and paused when he reached Steve. He sent another amused look at him. "Maybe you'll need to work better at teamwork and things like that. Look up things like 'communication' and 'fairness'." He nodded, satisfied with his words, and followed Tony out the door.

"What just happened?" Steve turned to the rest of the team. Natasha stared at the table with furrowed eyebrows, like she's disappointed she didn't see this coming. Wanda held the piece of paper in her hands, inspecting it closely as if she didn't notice Tony's departure at all. Vision stood beside her, silent as he's been the entire time, looking like he's trying to find all of the answers in his mind. Sam was the only one who reflected Steve's flabbergasted look back.

"Like I said," he shrugged, "I have no idea what just happened."

**Author's Note:**

> ✓ Bruce and Thor arent there post-Ultron. Clint retired. It's only these kids.  
> ✓ If you comment something about how I'm mean to Steve and the others :(( I know I agree, but I've always been a team iron man at heart and i cant turn away from that  
> ✓ LISTEN I KNOW THE OPINION OF WANDA BEING INCREDIBLY HATED BY A LOT OF TEAM IM,, but I just :(( if i remember correctly she WAS a kid when her parents died and was thrown into a world of bad influences, so now that shes trying to change, they should try to help her?? thats why rhodey is kinda nice to her. The phone number she got is for Stephen Strange because I bet Minister of Magic and, at the very least, Sorcerer Supreme would be in touch  
> —> Of course this doesnt factor in whether they know she had gotten to Tony's mind before. That's a whole other thing.


End file.
